“The universe knows how to organize itself. Stand back and let it come to you.” -Marianne Williamson

When I first set out to lose my baby fat and create my dream body back in 1999, I modified a photograph of Mark “Marky Mark” Wahlberg to have my head on his body. Creepy? Maybe. But I put the picture everywhere: on my bathroom mirror, my computer desktop — I even made a sticker and put the image on the back of my drivers license!

Back then I was 189 pounds and 29 percent body fat. Today, I weighed in at 215 pounds and 12 percent body fat. That means I’ve lost 29 pounds of fat. My body may not look exactly like Mark Wahlberg’s — but it is astoundingly closer than I ever could have dreamed back in ’99. There’s something to be said for the power of visualization.

When I used to meet with a client for the first time, one of my initial questions was “what kind of body do you want?” People usually answered by saying, “well I’d like to get rid of my spare tire” or “I’d like to be bigger” or “I want to (fill in the blank).”

The problem with most of these responses is that they’re not measurable. For every “spare tire” a person loses, another “smaller” one, inevitably, appears. And what does getting “bigger” mean, exactly? How does a person know when they’ve gotten “big enough?”

So instead of faulting the answer, I have learned to adapt my question. Now I ask prospective clients: “Can you think of a celebrity whose body most closely matches the one you’d like to achieve?” When I ask the question that way, the answers pour out: Brad Pitt, Jerry O’Connell, Jennifer Aniston, Halle Berry, Kate Winslet. It’s really quite amazing!

I too turn to physiques for inspiration. I’ve put a few of them here for you to see. The first one, at the top, is Brady Quinn, from the University of Notre Dame football team. The second is bodybuilder John Kesler. These guys have totally different “looks” and levels of muscularity, but basically the same frame. (more…)

I look into the window of my mind.
Reflections of the fears I know I’ve left behind.
I step out of the ordinary
I can feel my soul ascending.
I am on my way…
Can’t stop me now.
And you can do the same.
What have you done today
to make you feel proud?
(It’s never too late to try).
You could be so many people
if you make that break for freedom.
What have you done today
to make you feel proud?
-Heather Small (more…)

HEY SAM, I’m trying to lose 50 pounds but I seem to be in a rut. Can you tell me what I should be doing differently? —Karen, Long Beach, CA

Karen, life never stands still. If you’re not moving forward, you’re moving backward. Keeping a fitness journal is one of the best ways to ensure that you move in a positive direction.  You have to set goals for yourself and continue to strive for positive results.

The best way is to keep a personal fitness journal.  I like to use a small spiral bound book of lined recipe cards. (more…)

My mantra of the moment: “Beyond our ideas of right and wrong, there lies a field.  I’ll meet you there.” -Rumi

This was sent to me by a friend on his 40th birthday…

• Just because two people argue, it doesn’t mean they don’t love each other. And just because they don’t argue, it doesn’t mean they do.
• We don’t have to change friends if we understand that friends change.
• No matter how good a friend is, they’re going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.
• True friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love.
• You can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.
• It’s taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.
• You should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.
• You can keep going long after you think you can’t.
• You are responsible for what you do, no matter how you feel.
• Either you control your attitude or it controls you.
• Heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.
• Money is a lousy way of keeping score.
• Sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you’re down will be the ones to help you get back up.
• Sometimes when I’m angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn’t give me the right to be cruel.
• Maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you’ve had and what you’ve learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you’ve celebrated.
• It isn’t always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.
• No matter how bad your heart is broken, the world doesn’t stop for your grief.
• Our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.
• Two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.
• Even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you—you will find the strength to help.
• Credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.
• The people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.

Trees bending in wind,
effortlessly shifting form.
I am envious.

GROWING UP, I used to pretend that my red Radio Flyer was my very own car. I’d take imaginary trips to see my grandmother in southern Utah, holding an invisible steering wheel as I guided the “car” along each bend in the road. When I arrived at her house, I never wanted to leave.

Some things never change.

On my shoulder is a tattoo from Where the Wild Things Are. It’s the story of Max, a mischievous boy who goes on a scary adventure in a jungle far from home. He dances with monsters, who crown him “king of the wild things.”  We named our Yorkshire Terrier after him.

Max has come to symbolize my journey through life. After high school, I needed to get out of Utah. I didn’t know how to deal with the reality that I was into guys. After college, I moved to LA and launched HERO Magazine. Maybe then they’ll accept me, I thought. I spent the better part of a decade chasing that.

In the wake of my mom’s health, that seems so distant and unimportant now.

There’s this flood of conflicting emotions inside me; I’m still in a daze.
I’m angry that we’ve essentially lost 12 years: we’ll never get them back.
I feel guilty: did I contribute to her cancer?

I’m coming to grip with that line in Fight Club:

This is your life, and it’s ending one minute at a time.

I’m overwhelmed by all the love and support, and at the same time I’m not very good at accepting help. Ironically, the concern of loved ones causes me to retreat deeper into the jungle.

Fortunately, Where the Wild Things Are ends on an up note: Max eventually gets lonely and returns home to his room and finds a hot supper waiting for him.

Like Max, these past seven days have taught me that no matter how hard you try, you can’t run away from home.

by CONNY VAN DYKE

The #1 thing that I have learned when accepting the custom Zig-Zag meal plan from my trainer, Sam Page is that, when you are given the plan, don’t question it; do it.  Do not start substituting foods or asking Sam if you may substitute foods.  You have engaged a professional and it makes no sense to augment, delete or substitute information which you have decided to follow.  No more than you would second-guess your auto mechanic, your doctor, your lawyer or your accountant.  If you adhere to the plan, you will see a marked change in your health and in your body contour/shape.  After only 10 days, I began to see difference in the way my clothing fit me.

Conny Van Dyke is an accomplished actress, singer and songwriter whose career has spanned 20 years. Her guest starring role on CBS’ “Cold Case” last fall marked her return to prime time.

Although looking at the numbers on a scale can be helpful, it is also noticing the change/shift in your body shape.  Muscle mass develops and body fat decreases. Both things are necessary to achieve a healthier and more physically attractive you.  I have adopted the plan sincerely enough that it has changed the way in which I perceive food and it has broadened my understanding of how my body is happier.  Even on my “Cheat Days” (Wednesday and Saturday), there are so many things that I would have eaten last year which I now wouldn’t think of eating!  This includes the portions of these things.  If you pay attention to your body, you will notice that it is repulsed when you even think of consuming a huge lump of something heavy and laden with sugars and starches. Your body has begun to respond to the right things it has been given and no longer wants to break-down for utilization the junk with which it was once forced to work.

Yes, I have lost 27 pounds. It has made a huge difference in my appearance but, and more importantly, it has made a huge difference in the way I carry myself, my ability to think more clearly and to be present.  I do not have the same pain intensity in my back because I am not carrying the same load around.  That means a lot to someone like me who has had 2 back operations and has some arthritis. (more…)